5 Sleazy Ways To Get Chics
If there is one thing that is clear just by looking at me, its that I am a rock-star when it comes to the ladies. I credit my skills to various rap artists lyrical dating advice, an extensive 3 girlfriend dating history & my beastly overpowering tattoo. So lets get to business and list my 5 sleazy ways to get chics.
1. Love Hurts. Get your prospects home & work numbers and sign them up as your primary emergency contact, then find the most hopeless way to mess yourself up.
2. Puppy Love. Steal their pet, then wait for the missing posters. Be sure to have a great story about how you had to rescue the pup from one of those 6 packs rings that those trash hippies always complain about.
3. Mission Numpossible. This one takes some 007 skills. 10 points to write your number on a napkin with awesome sexy name like “Pierce, Magnus or Casey Decker” and sneak it into their purse. 20 points to get into their cell & enter your name.
4. Opposites Attract. No luck with 1-3? Try some reverse psychology and go ahead and get a restraining order against them. If they don’t try to contact you to ask why, try registering them as a sex offender.
5. You didn’t really expect five tips did you?
October 14th, 2008 at 8:19 pm
=P
funny cause back when i ever bought six packs of soda, i used to be a crazy ring cutter. if that thing went into the trash without being disassembled and mutilated (so the dolphins would choke on it rather than get their moths stuck in it), i was not a happy girl.
i never thought about it but i think that was what got me started.
and if you can’t even come up with five, you can’t claim scumbaggidyness.
but nice try.
October 14th, 2008 at 8:26 pm
moths…or mouths…
whatever.
hmph